Friday, January 5, 2018

The In-Between

It's that time of year where everyone is talking about goals, calendars, and planners. This year, my focus is a little less on goals and a little more around the idea of "the in-between". Though I first heard this term on one of the podcasts I regularly listen to, I have been having conversations around the subject for years. So what is "the in-between"? It's the space between "all or nothing". It's working with what you have, whether it's time, skills, or money. Years ago, Connor first noticed my tendency to either workout for a full 45 minute minimum or not at all. If I couldn't get abs,cardio, and weights in, it wasn't worth it. As I type it out, that sounds crazy.....but the truth is I can still be like that on a much smaller scale. These days it looks like "10 minutes for a workout? Not worth it."

It's not just my fitness regimen that has been affected by this "all or nothing" mentality. It can touch all areas of life, such as: reading, meditation, cooking, traveling, health, sleep, friendships/relationships, etc.  We say "she and I will never be best friends", so we don't invest in that relationship, or "I only have 30 minutes, that's not enough time for a nap" when simply closing our eyes help. We pad the "all or nothing" mentality with phrases like "it doesn't make sense", "it's not worth it", or "it's not practical". 

While there are many areas I want to work on in this area, there are some areas in my life where we definitely live in the "in-between" and I can vouch for it's life giving components.  Those areas can bring about an eye-roll from folks ("so impractical!" they say) who don't understand, and that's ok. One area that we live this way is with our travel. We frequently do long day trips (up to 3hrs away) to meet up with friends or just to check out a cool destination we've been wanting to see. If we waited to make every day trip into a weekend trip, we would miss out on a lot. When we come back from one of those day trips, sure we are tired- but our hearts are full because of the adventure we had or the friends we saw.....worth it.
(pic from a day trip to Vermont this fall)
 I'm the same with interior design. Can't afford tile right now? I'll paint it. It also sometimes means designing a room halfway and waiting for budget to allow me to finish it (instead of not starting at all). While I want to make sure my house is safe for my kids and it's designed with them in mind, like any designer, I also am willing to put in extra work so that I can enjoy it too, knowing full well it could get ruined. The truth is, we would all cringe if a child took scissors to a couch or rug, no matter what- so why not buy one that you love (within a reasonable price point of course), knowing in the back of your mind it could get ruined. Meanwhile, you live there....spend years there, and that well designed space brings life and joy. 
(I hate that dining room lighting, but this is me living in the in-between - a half designed room)

So what is so important about the in-between? In short- it gives life. Before you label something as "impractical", stop for a second and consider if that thing could bring a lot of joy to your life. If it does, maybe it's worth it.


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